Being back in reality sucks. Ever since i received that call days ago, my motivation for work has been decreasing since. I realized what i want is not about earning money anymore but actually doing/pursing what i like to do. We are only given a chance to live this life once and i honestly believe we should live it well and leave this world with no regrets.
I have some thing in mind but i'm not sure if i'm ever going to make it there. For now, i shall just try to do whatever i can so i can make it there. I do not want to put any hopes because honestly, i'm actually chasing a broken dream. I am already handicapped right from the start.
Met the bf after work to have dinner and catch a movie. Wednesday is pretty much the only weekday i get to see him unless i do not have any shifts on other days... I honestly can't believe i'm still with the same person after 19 months going 20 months in 5 days. There's actually someone who can tolerate my nonsense this long.
Back when i was in secondary school, my temper was better so i can say that i'm not really a nonsensical/hard to handle kind of girl?
My temper changed overtime...I became even more short tempered i myself don't even know how or why. I used to be the kind of person who would close one eye and just ignore the things people do or say about me but i guess there's a limit to everything and people started climbing over my head. I had to handle much more shit at work as compared to when i was studying. I know at times i will go overboard, but i honestly thank God for the people in my life right now. They stood by me from the start till now, and you have no idea how grateful i am.
I guess the worst thing that has happened to me so far would be my sort-of 'close' friend telling tales about me w/o even confirming it with me. Worst, to the people who are pretty much would be important in my life. The thing that person did/say sorta ruined everything i tried to build. To be honest, it wasn't easy coming this far. How am i supposed to just forget whatever you did to me? It's not that i want to be childish and not talk to you, it's just i'd rather keep my mouth shut so you can never have anything against me ever again. What if this happened to you? I told myself not to do the same thing you did to me because Karma will come back to you one day. It doesn't mean you had a downfall before, it won't happen again. And this time, i won't even bother being there for you, i won't even try.
08.10.2013 // Tuesday
I ended up buying a men's polo tee and make it a dress during work cuz my outfit was so uncomfortable since i had to bend down most of the time.
Whatever i have been feeling recently really sucks. I can't wait to get away next wednesday with my ten pin kidz!
Till next time
$$
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